Saturday, November 24, 2007

Top 5 Waylon Moments


If I don't force myself to take a break from my music obsession...I might never stop so here is a music free (mostly) blog.

So we all know that I LOVE C. Montgomery Burns (favorite Simpson's character EVER) but as with many things in life...you can't have one without the other. You don't get Monty without Waylon Smithers and honestly, that is okay. I like Mr. Smithers...I actually think that in "real life" we would probably be friends. (Yes I well aware of how crazy that sounds...deal with it!). So here is my tribute to Springfield's most "loyal" assistant...Waylon Smithers Jr.

To blantantly rip off Wikipedia...Mr. Smithers is your stereotypical closest gay man...though the show's producers say that he is techinically "Burns-sexual", which I guess means that he only enjoys the company of Burns. (Who can blame him??? 8>)...kidding.) I do know nor do I care if Waylon is Burns-sexual, Homer-sexual, or anti-sexual...etc...I just know that my heart goes out for Waylon. Here is a list of my favorite Burns-sexual moments so far on the Simpsons.

#5: In Lady Bouvier's Lover...Burns ask Waylon for help composing a love letter so he recites "Darling One, read my words and hear my heart speak of a love soft and undying; a love that will be with you always. Sincerely, yatta yatta yatta." Then Waylon tells Burns that is the birthday card that he sent him on his last birthday and starts to cry. It is quite touching...

#4: In Lisa verses Malibu Stacy, Lisa asks Waylon for help tracking down the inventor of the Malibu Stacy doll. When he turns on his home computer, a naked picture of Burns comes up and says in broken English "Hello Smithers, you are quite good at turning me on."



#3: In Mother Simpson (one of my favorite episodes...but we'll discuss that another night), when Burns and the police arrive at the Simpson's house, Burns discovers that Waylon had recorded over "Ride of the Valkyries" with a recording of Abba's "Waterloo". (Disclaimer...I know that it is merely a stereotype that all gay men like Abba. No offense intended.)

#2: Burns Baby Burns...when Burn's son Larry disobeys him...Burns asks Smithers to take off his belt: Smithers replies "With Pleasure Sir". Hmmmm...

And the best Waylon Burns-sexual moment is

#1: This Little Wiggy...Lisa's message-rocket breaks into Burns' office it lands in Burns' suit. He says "Smithers there is a rocket in my pocket." Waylon replies, "You don't have to tell me Sir."

My heart goes out to you Waylon Smithers....your Da Bomb in my book!

1 comment:

The Kiskadian said...

why do you like gay people so much? smithers, neil, Vigil, bon jovi.