Sunday, November 25, 2007

Read With Caution

Let's be honest...We've all heard of them...we all love to watch them even if we won't admit it. You know what I am talking about...that's right...Dumb Ass Movies. The kind that require absolutely no effort to follow the plot (assuming of course that there is one in the first place). Sure they aren't going to win any academy awards...many have actually won Razzies...that is not the point. The point is that it doesn't matter if you are trying to shake some one's words out of your head or avoid starting on another damn paper for class (both happen to be true in this case), throwing in one these movies are a sure way to get away from thinking in general. So here is my tribute to Dumb Ass Movies:

Eurotrip: Okay, so this movie is new on the list for me, having only recently made it into the rotation. The basic plot of this movie is that recent high school graduate Scotty is dumbed by his sweetheart and embarks on a whirlwind trip of Europe (betcha didn't see that one coming) with his friends. The beginning scene were Fiona dumps Scotty is only funny because it isn't happening to you. A previous blog refers to Matt Damon playing a punk rocker who is singing about scoring with Scotty's girlfriend on the DL, which is the reason that I was able to stick with the movie the first time that I watched...because it really is dumb. The fun picks up and if you can get over that fact that the situations are not entirely plausible, it is worth watching. Highlights include Scotty mistaking his super hot female pen-pal for an old man sexual predator, a robot-dance showdown with a mime in front of the Louvre (ending with a kick in the crotch to the mime who falls down saying in robot voice "Error, Error".) a not so pleasant nude beach, the German take on Hammertime, Jenny getting drunk and consequently making a poor choice when selecting a make-out buddy, and naughty fun at the Vatican. All the while, poor Scotty is haunted by various versions of Scotty Doesn't Know all throughout Europe.

Undercover Brother: Okay any movie with a token white guy going to be funny...but Neil Patrick Harris as that white guy takes it it to another level. Rag on Doogie Hauser all you want, but Neil is a funny actor. So this movie is funny for a few reasons...but honestly it is really because of the awesome performances of Neil and Chris Kattan. Their over the top whiteness is the what make the well as remind me of myself. Both stars have defining moments in the film. Chris Kattan's comes when he is cannot stop himself from busting a groove to the Mary J Blige hit Family Affair. Neil's comes when he is gets called a sissy and responds by ripping the heart out of the poor guy who utter those words. Good me.

The Burbs: Okay so this one is borderline, since the plot is tolerable and not that stupid. Tom Hanks plays the typical overworked suburban dad who is trying to take a vacation. His neighbors manage to convince him that his new neighbors murdered the old man down the street. The laughs start rolling in as a they attempt to determine the truth in the burbs. Highlights include: thoughts of satanic rituals, bags of garage being beat with a stick, electrocutions, a king gesture that gets mistaken for a doggie ransom note, and Carrie Fisher as the disapproving wife. All of the tomfoolery is being watched by neighborhood teen Ricky Butler, who is rightfully played by Corey Feldman, who steals the show with classic lines like "Dude you are going to miss the pizza guy!" and later on "The pizza dude is here!". In spite of all of this, there is only one real reason to watch this movie and that is see broken and bandaged Tom Hanks completely freak out towards the end of the movie. His character has an understandable break down as he explains that they have the problem, not the scary neighbors. He announces that they are the lunatics as he throws a chair into the street in front of the house that they caused to explode. He then lays down on the gurney and asks to be taken to the hospital because he is sick. When no one moves quick enough, he jumps up, throws the gurney into the back of the ambulance, and climbs on in. It is a classic freak out moment and the best part of the movie. God I love this street!

Buffy the Vampire Slayer (The movie, not be confused with the TV show which is dumb but not funny and not worth watching nor blogging about.): This movie is DUMB...but I love it. I seem to remember having it on VHS and watching it over and over as a young teen. The good thing (or maybe the sad thing) is that it still makes me laugh to this day in spite of the fact that I can recite the movie line by line. So I know that you know the plot so I will skip to my favorite parts of the movie. First, is when David Arquette's character who has recently been turned into a vampire and flies up to Luke Perry's window. As he is begging to be let in, he pleads "Come on man I'm hungry." to which a confused Luke Perry replies " Come on man you're floating!". I guess you have to see it but it is funny. Second...after Merrick (played by Donald Sutherland) rescues Luke Perry's character for the second time, Buffy asks if he knows him. Merrick replies no but it seems that the young man has a habit of passing out in front of him whenever he passes by. Next, Luke Perry's character attempts to hit on Buffy early in movie, only to rebuffed in true Valley Girl fashion. When he introduces himself as Pike, she responds that Pike isn't a name, it is a fish. I always wanted to meet a Pike in order to steal this line. Finally, my favorite part of the movie is when Buffy is shocked when she finds out that she has been dumped by her boyfriend. "You broke up with my machine??" she asks in horror. It just reminds of bubblegum days of high school and makes me smile. How far we've come indeed Rob Thomas.

So my apologies for a less than stellar blog today. Writing about these movies does not have the same mind-numbing effect as watching them I guess. The lack of sleep plus the fact that my brain is thinking of a million other things are not a good combo for great blogging. Assuming my slacker nature continues to get the best of me, perhaps will I finally respond to RK's challenge of Graceland from last week instead of writing my paper later tonight.


The Kiskadian said...

i'm that the fact the NPH is your buddy has nothign to do with him being on your list. he's a bitch.

Millie said...

Be careful Robin...your jealous jerk side is showing.

Why are you in a such a bad mood?

The Kiskadian said...

i'm not I just wish that you see your precious nph for what he is which is a little bitch.

Millie said...

Robin...I know why you are being an ass. Call if you need to but only if you stop writing mean things.

Todd said...

Hey Graceland was my challenge damn it. You can't tell me that you forgot that you made me listen to that damn song for three and half straight hours!

No Love MV, no love.

Millie said...

Sorry Todd...I was a little sidetracked.

As far as your comment...I remember it slightly differently. After all...I was asleep so how did I make you do anything? Besides, it was only like two hours.

Nevertheless...nothing but love my dear friend...nothing but love.