Friday, August 8, 2008

His Name is Kal-El, He Will Call Himself Clark Kent but the World Will Know Him as Superman

Today actually started off well. I got to sleep in for a few minutes, took Joba for a nice walk, took a long hot shower, enjoyed a leisurely breakfast, and then got into my car in order to head out to CG Academy for what I assumed would be a quick medical appointment. I would be in and out and then I would head into the office to finish the day. It would be a good Friday indeed. How wrong I was.

As I sat in my car, eating an exchanged purchased lunch four hours after I had arrived at the Academy...a quote from The Simpsons came to mind. I was reminded of the time that Moe talked about how everything was going well for him and Edna when "Suddenly fate decided to play a little game I like to call 'Up Yours Moe'". Insert Millie for Moe and you have my feelings from the day. Oh well.

So anyway...while waiting for my unexpected X-Ray, a less than sensitive person mentioned that I have had a lot of X-Rays in my 26 years...which of course got the sci-fi geek in me thinking. In sci-fi world...all of the X-Rays would result in some kind of superhero abilities...and that wouldn't be a bad thing. This prompted me to think about the various superheroes that I have loved over the years. So here is my list of the Top 5 Superheroes.

#5 Radioactive Man: OK so this one is sure to put me in the line of fire with hard core superhero fans but I don't care. He has an awesome catch phrase "Up and Atom!" and he is from The Simpsons. There really isn't much else you could ask for. He was created as a result of falling into a radioactive generator and ever since has entertained the fine folks of Springfield. While I have never actually seen him save anyone or anything...I still love the guy. I fully admit that my judgement might be clouded by my loyalty to the Simpsons and all things pertaining to.

#4 Underdog: First let me say that I am referring to the old school animated series and not the monstrosity that was the 2007 movie. Don't even try to tell me that he is not a superhero just because he is a dog. He was a dog who could fly and speak in rhyme! That is pretty awesome no matter how you look at it. He flawless maintained his secret identity all the while he was fighting crime with the best of them...all within like 15 minutes. Never mind the fact that of all the superheroes...it would seem that Underdog often caused a lot of damage when he fought crime. It was always a small price to pay in order to ensure the security of the people who loved him so. Looking back I have to wonder about the shows many "subtitle" references...such as the Underdog Super Energy Pill. That being said...who wouldn't love a dog who totally ripped off Superman by changing in a phone booth?

#3 Spiderman: OK...so anyone who can survive a spider bite is a winner in my book. Peter Parker managed to turn my greatest fear into a positive, life changing moment...which is the sole reason that he makes the list.

#2 The Green Arrow: The first reason that I love The Green Arrow is because he is obviously inspired by Robin Hood...which has always been a favorite story of mine. It was originally written that he was a "castaway" who was lost on a deserted island, who taught himself how to shoot a bow and arrow in order to survive. So he has the obvious advantage of being a self-made hero. His hero abilities are all self-taught and not enhanced in anyway...which makes him all the more awesome. Yet the image of the Green Arrow didn't reach the level of adoration that it is at now until Smallville added The Green Arrow to the plot of Smallville. As I have previously posted on this blog...scenes featuring Tom Welling and Justin Hartley were almost too much for me to handle. So now in the mind of Millie...The Green Arrow is a total badass who is also incredibly sexy.

And this should come as no surprise if you follow the blog...

#1 Superman: It doesn't matter if we are talking about George Reeve, Christopher Reeve, Dean Cain, or Tom Welling (and so on)...Superman will also be the alpha hero. As I have said before, he is finest example of all of the traits necessary to be a superhero. He is merciful, selfless, and compassionate even to those who are not deserving of his kind nature. One of the many things that I love of Superman is the fact that he was risking all to save a foreign species. He wasn't human by birth and yet he loved mankind and fought for them because he loved them. Of course, his love for mankind might have brought on a lot of the trouble that he encountered but the hey...no one is perfect. Like most heroes...he suffered greatly in order to protect society but I can't help but think that his torment was a little greater than other heroes. Unlike Oliver Queen and Bruce Wayne...Clark Kent did not choose to become a hero. Clark Kent was destined to be one before he could walk. While Bruce and Oliver were remarkable men...there were just that...men. Clark Kent was a "intergalactic traveler" who ended up on a planet where he just so happened to be far stronger and faster than anyone else. While all heroes have a secret to hide, Clark's has also seemed greater to me. The greater the secret...the greater the risk. If this post doesn't convince you that Superman is the greatest hero EVER...once again I must refer you to Superman's Song by the Crash Test Dummies. Again I cannot help but admit that "Sometimes I despair that the world will never see another man like him."
So far...I have not acquired any superhero abilities. In fact...at the moment I am wallowing in self pity as I once again try to understand why fate likes to play "Up Yours Millie" when it comes to my health.

Cross your fingers and toes and anything else you can cross that Yankees have a good weekend and that the Red Sux and Twins do not. Of course...the Twins are playing the Mariners so I am not holding my breath but I am thinking that the White Sox are quite capable of putting quite a hurt on the Red Sux this weekend.

10 comments:

Kenny said...

Hey, are you ok? I hope everything is going alright, drop me a line if you need to talk.

The Kiskadian said...

WTF Milville? Tell me its not your shoulder again.

THE TODD said...

My dear friend, this is your karma for training so hard for so long as a kid and never getting hurt. Whatever it is, my fingers are crossed that you don't have to go under the knife again.

It is purely selfish reasons that I say this. You always leave the blog to me and that is too much pressure. Just kidding.

Great post by the way. This one is one of the best.

Dr. Fine said...

Underdog? Oh Millie Vanille, that is lame even for you. And how could you leave off Batman and the Hulk. Both are way better than Radioactive Man and Underdog.

Dr. Fine said...

I have to bring up that it is really freaky how much the Green Arrow guy looks like a certain asshole who likes to comment on your blog.

Kenny said...

I agree with Dr. Fine, leaving off Batman is sacriledge! I can't fault you for Underdog, but Radioactive Man?!

Chance said...

I may not comment much, but I read you. Hope you're doing ok.

The Kiskadian said...

Her name is Jacquelyn, she will call herself Millie but the world will know her as The Geek That Is Millie.

THE TODD said...

Kiskadian that is lame.

Millie said...

That's not lame! I love it and totally stealing it. It is time I changed my blog layout anyway.