Sunday, May 10, 2009

Mommie Dearest

Happy Mother's Day Folks. Being a mom is a funny thing. No amount of preparation can prepare you for it. No amount of sleep can keep you ahead of it. And yet it is without a doubt the greatest adventure a woman could ever embark on.

So as tribute to all the Mom's of the is my list of the Top Ten Pop Culture Moms.

# 10 - Endora from Bewitched: Sure she was terrible to Darrin but it was understandable. Think about it, your daughter is an all powerful witch and she marries a mortal? It would be like marrying a minor league bat boy when Derek Jeter is trying to court you. Yet for all of the abuse that she gave Darrin...she never used her magic to do anything too terrible to the man because she loved her daughter. She just did enough to keep Darrin in line. If you were a mom with that ability wouldn't you do it too? I would.

# 9 - Jill Taylor from Home Improvement: Jill deserves to be on this count as does any mother of three boys whose father's regularly blows himself up. Jill had a remarkable sense of humor considering how much shit Tim put her through. I also like that how well she played the nurturing mom in house with four males walking around grunting to show their "manhood". However I must point out that the house was always spotless which leads me to believe that they had a maid that we never saw or that Jill was popping Brad's Ritalin.

# 8 - Dorothy Boyd from Jerry Maguire: Now here is a real mom. Within her first five minutes of screen time in the movie she discusses her grown-up woes with and the proceeds to "misplace" her five year old son. Yet in spite of these can tell that she really loves her boy. Her major momma moment comes when she tells her love Jerry that she has to leave because he can't afford for her to stay. It takes a lot to walk away from love and yet she was ready to do it to provide for her son.

# 7 - Marge Simpson from The Simpsons: Good old Marge. She might not be raising the picture perfect family but she is raising them nonetheless. For some reason today I am reminded of the time that her family had been brainwashed by The Leader. Marge fought off crazy bubbles, landmines, alligators and employed religion and flat out deception to save her family. Sure she isn't perfect but she is one hell of a mother. You gotta love Marge.

# 6 - Christine Collins from Changeling: Holy here is a devoted mother. Christine was institutionalized as a result of her motherly instinct. You have to respect a mother who would be willing to take on an entire city police department for her kid. As I pointed out to someone this week...A Mother Knows.

# 5 - Kitty Foreman from That 70s Show: Who wouldn't want a mother like Kitty? She cooks, she cleans, and defends her children to everyone...including her husband. Kitty opened her home to all of the neighborhood kids and become surrogate mother to just about every one of them at some point throughout the show. Quick to offer advice and a hug...Kitty was THE MOM of Point Pleasant.

# 4 - Mrs. Gump from Forrest Gump: Now here is another mother who was willing to go the extra mile in order to provide for her son. Seriously... I think what sticks with me the most about Mrs. Gump was not sexual degradation that she endured for him...but the love she expressed for him. She loved her son because of and in spite of everything that made him Forrest. She was always seen beaming with pride which is pretty damn cool.

# 3 - Sarah Conner from Terminator 2: And here we have another mother who endured a mental hospital as a result of motherly instinct. What makes Sarah better than Christine is that Sarah didn't just get mad...she got violent. I bet that Christine would have gotten her kid back sooner if she would have rolled up with a shotgun. Sarah was willing to anyone and anything that threatened her son and she looked amazing doing. Probably not the most endearing mother to make my list but definitely the one you want if shit is going down.

# 2 - M'Lynn Eatentor from Steel Magnolias: So here is the deal with M'Lynn....she was not a picture perfect mother. She fought like hell with her daughter Shelby at points during the movie and that is what makes her a great mom. She was not afraid to tell off her daughter that she was making a bad decision because she loved her. We don't see enough of that in Hollywood Moms...the telling off of the kids out of love. I have seen the movie at least 100 times and it still makes me cry. I always think of the scene after Shelby's funeral and how much M'Lynn flips out. The anger and the sticks with me. Now that is a mom! we have established that all of the above mom's are pretty damn awesome. All of them are willing to go the extra mile for their kids. But there is one mom who takes that one step further and that is why she is the #1 Mom in Pop Culture...

# 1 -Diane Freeling from Poltergeist: It is one thing to go the looney bin for your is another thing all together to go to the beyond the boundaries of this world and that is what Diane did. Her is a mom who flat out refused to let her kids go and went into an unknown realm to get her kids back. Now that is love.

Honorable Mention - Annie Collins-Nielsen in What Dreams May Come: Annie missed the list because the movie suuuuuuccckkkked! That being said...I get Annie. I understand her breakdown at the loss of her kids. Too bad was so terrible that the her portrayal of the grieving mother is completely lost.

So all you readers...Happy Mothers Day. If you haven't called your mom yet...shame on you! Turn off your computer and pick up the phone.


Andrew said...

Every now and then you surprise me. You have a list of mainstream moms but manage to throw in one total shocker. Nice choice with Endora. Never would have thought of her or Jill Taylor. Nicely done little Padawan.

Chance said...

Yay, Sarah Connor! And quite a plausible defense of Endora.

THE TODD said...

Happy Mother's Day Millie Vanillie. I can honestly say that next to my are the best mother around. Elizabeth is a lucky girl.

Haven't heard from you in awhile so I am worried. I hope you are just busy.

Much love my dearest friend.

Cody said...

I know that if you were faced with any of the stuff that these moms were faced with that you would prevail just like they did.

I don't agree with your rankings. Mrs. Gump is the best mom ever.

Victor said...

Sarah Conner would kick the ass of every other mom on here except for Endora but only because she can work magic. It wouldn't be a fair fight.

MoVi said...

You are still a Jerry Maguire freak!

Happy Madres Day Chicka!