Now Clark Kent...There Was A Real Gent

Happy Monday...which of course means Monday Night Shuffle.

Superman's Song by the Crash Test Dummies (132) - I first heard this song while hooked up to the E-Stem machine at physical therapy recovering from shoulder surgery #4. Aside from its obvious appeal of being about the greatest Superhero of all time...the song touched me because it sings of how hard it must have been to be Superman. Superman didn't have to use his powers for good yet he did. He didn't have to slave away at The Daily Planet to pay his bills but he choose to earn an honest (?) living instead of using his powers to rob banks. Best of all the song talks about how there must have been times when Superman must have wanted to quit yet he never did. I must have been in a pretty low place in my rehab because the song actually spoke to me. It told me that in spite of my ongoing struggles to get healthy, I must channel my inner superhero and keep on fighting the good fight. In a weird way I think that it was fate to hear that song at the moment...that or I am just a music freak who tries to find meaning in songs because I keep coming short when I look for it anywhere else. Either way...this song is damn awesome! Best Line: " Superman never made any money for saving the world from Solomon Grundy and sometimes I despair the world will never see another man like him." Me too...me too.

I Wanna Go Back by Eddie Money (99) - What can I say? I love Eddie Money. I always smile whenever I hear one of his songs because I am reminded of a road trip to El Paso that Bobby, Todd, and I took and for whatever reason Eddie Money's Greatest Hits was the only CD that I wanted to listen to. As the third round of play started Bobby had finally had enough and insisted that I turn it off because he felt like he was "trapped in a shitty 80s music video". It is fitting that this song is one of my favorite songs by Eddie because of the best line of the song compliments this story quite nicely. Best Line: "I was listening to the radio and I heard a song reminded me of long ago, back then I thought that things were never gonna change".

Standing Outside a Broken Phone Booth With Money in My Pocket by the Primitive Radio Gods (26) - If for no other reason, one must like this song based off the title alone. That being said, the song makes no damn sense to me and never has. It just seems like a bunch of random shit thrown together with a catchy beat. I don't listen to the song much because it seems unnecessarily long to me and because I feel like I have to think every time I hear it...yet I still don't get it. Whatever. There is one line of the song that I find clever and thought-provoking so we'll use that as the Best Line: " We sit outside and argue all night long about a God we've never seen but never fails to side with me".

You Can Call Me Al by Paul Simon (83) - This is another song that brings out the groove in all of us. It is impossible not to dance just a little bit to this song. For the longest time I loved this song before I even knew what it was about and it was for one reason only...the video. Hell I still love the video and if I can could find a way to add it to my iPod I would. Fortunately (?) my tastes have matured and I can appreciate the song without the help of Chevy Chase. Another great thing about this song is that it is another example of why Paul is awesome and Art is not. I think that there is a lot to be said about the best line of the song but I am too tired to dive into all of the ways I perceive it. So here it is and you can figure out what it means to you. Best Line: "If you'll be my bodyguard, I can be your long lost pal!"

If I Had Been The One by .38 Special (61) - Hmmm...at the risk of inviting further accusations that I have shit for music taste... I must admit that I am quite fond of .38 Special. While this is not my favorite song by the band it is certainly better than some of the shit that is popular these days. I cannot help but sing along with this song which is usually greeted by strange looks because most people are not familiar with the song. I like the confrontational aspect of this song. I think that anyone who has ever been dumped would love the chance to ask the very same questions that are asked in this song. Best Line: "Could you smile when inside you just wanna cry?"

And let's take a moment in honor of the greatest comedic geniuses of all time....George Carlin. Now I'll be honest, I actually teared up a little bit when I read the news of his passing because let's face...everything the guy did was freakin' awesome!

So here is the George Carlin Top 5 According to Millie:

#5 Munchie on the The Simpsons. One of two hippie characters that I have not immediately hated. (The other is Fillmore from Cars who is also voiced by Carlin but not worthy of the Top 5 List.) Any friend of Homer's is a friend of mine.

#4 The unnamed Hitchhiker from Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back...for reminding us to live by the book.

#3 Cardinal Glick...because how can one not laugh at a golf playing cardinal played by Carlin? It might be one of the finest casting jobs ever.

#2 Bart Trinke from Jersey Girl...naysayers be damned but I love this movie. George Carlin showed a rare sensitive side while still be funny as hell. Who didn't want a dad and/or grandpa like Mr. Trinke after watching this movie? Seriously...I loved this movie and think that everyone should see it. If it helps...J-Lo dies like ten minutes into the movie.

#1 When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?...which is actually one of the better written books that I have read in the past few years. While it is not his funniest work...it is George Carlin doing what he does best...which is offending damn near everyone.

For the record...I left Seven Curse Words off the list because I have only read about it and have no first hand experience with the incident. Besides....everyone always thinks of that first whenever they hear George's name.

He will be missed...